Do you every have days when you feel like you just can't take it anymore? Weather it is from your illness or just your life in general. Yesterday was one of those days for me. It was not my depression it was that I had had enough of bullshit in my life. My husband drinks everyday, my step son was emotionally and physically abused from his mother and her boyfriend. Unfortunately I take the brunt of all his anger towards his mother. He called and spoke to her on Thursday. She spoke to him for 5 minutes! She had not spoken to him in 32 days. I know he can not say anything to her ever! Over all the years of abuses he learned to never speak about what was going on in his mothers house. I know he loves me but I just am too sick and will not take his anger.
I was in bed for an entire day. I was so upset and had had it that I was ready to leave and disappear. I feel like all I am is a cook, maid and the person who gets everyone's frustration. If I had a place to go I would have left yesterday. That is how much I am sick of it all. So after having a full day to gather my thoughts I had a family meeting with everyone. I told my step son I know he has pain from all the issues he incurred from his mother and her boyfriend. I told him I will no longer tolerate him being disrespectful, rude and hateful to me. I said your old enough to say you want to go to go to speak to a therapist. Do not take your issues out on me. I told him I am not his mother and his father is not your mothers boyfriend so don't take it out on us. My husband I told him to get his crap together. I told him he is 44 years old and he better stop using this that or the other as excuses to drink. I told the both of them if they didn't change then I was leaving. I said I am sick and what time I have left on this earth will NOT be spent in hostility, anger and drama. I said if they don't change one day I will be just be gone. I said you will never see me again or hear from me.
I personally would rather be alone then to live like this. Life is short and shorter for those of us who are sick. I love them both but I will put myself and my sanity first. So we will see what happens. Ohh my husband did try to be a bit of a smart ass and ask me....if your asking us to change then what are you going to change. I immediately said.... Oh ok you want to know what I am changing! It's that I am on strike! I will no longer cook, clean, do all of your laundry! I said I was going to be Doug for awhile! That's what I am changing! I got up to eat dinner and I saw my step son had put all his laundry in the hall. He tells me oh I put my laundry in the hall for you. I said that's nice but I am on strike and I am not doing it! The kitchen is a mess too. I am not doing it! I am tired of only being good for cooking, cleaning, laundry or to be rude to! I will only be washing my own clothes from now on. I just asked him if he was going to do dishes before we went to bed. He got up pissed and is slamming dishes and cabinets! Poor baby! Get used of it!
Well I hope everyone had a better weekend then me. Although it feel great to finally stand up for myself! I wish you could see him doing the dishes in anger! It's funny!
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Twitter: @mywonderMSlife
Have a good day everyone and remember that you have to lay down to let someone walk on you. Stand up and stop it from happening! I did and it feel great!!!!!
Thanks
Christine
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